I wish i had courage


:( But i dont.

My sister in law announced her first pregnancy yesterday - I am so jealous (Happy for them too)

But I am just - even though my prolapse is much better than when i arrived here - too scared. :(

Shame i can't get another woman to carry for me (joke)

I just worry so much about what 'might' be - that I freak myself out...

Guess this is about the time to just give in and be thankful for what I have - cos I just cannot take that first step of getting pregnant - then if i were i would spend the net 9mths worrying like an idiot

Like the idiot I am I guess

(I will understand if this post is deleted - it serves no purpose whatsoever and I am so sorry)


But I wanna thank Christine as she helped me so much - Things are better - it doesnt bother me continually like it used to...

So - Thank you so much Christine

Sue - I missed this post this morning. My screen cuts off most of the P&P forum.

We need SO MUCH INFORMATION in this area. Like, what is the VERY WORST it could get after another vaginal delivery. And, of course, does vaginal delivery make an existing prolapse worse at all, and in what percentage of the population. If we knew those things it would be so much easier to make a decision. Doctors routinely tell women one thing, yet anecdotal evidence suggests something quite different.



Yeah - All the gynae says is they 'wont say yes or no' to have another baby

leaves you fearing the worst all the time

We really NEED to know - will my insides come out after another

I am at the end of my biological clock

it is clanginggggggggggggggggg not ticking - and i fear my fears are winning and I wont have the courage to have one more

I waited almost five years before tak9ing the courage to start another pregnancy, because I had your same fear.
I changed doctor because the one who had treated me after the second baby with Chinese stuff and acupuncture, realizing thea there were no changes, suggested a reconstructive surgery DURING the C.section if I decided for a third child. The second doctor was not of the same idea,so vaginal delivery was never questioned, and he still considers repairing surgery my fatal destiny, sooner or later.
On one thing they agreed (and they were right), that is during pregnancy the uterus is kind of lifted up, so the symptoms almost disappear. The thing the doctor did not realize was the my bladder prolapse was "in the way", so, there was not a real risk for my baby, but I had to be catheterized twice because I could not urinate AT ALL, my kidney was swollem I had back ache almost all the time, I could not drink a drop of coffe, no chocolate, but the worst thing is that i did not know it was because of the bladder until the end of the pregnancy, when another doctor made an ultrasound showing the the bladder was in the way between the vagina and the baby,and the little tube leading out urine (sorry I am not trained in medical language, ask if you don't understand)was squeezed. So the midwife had to take care to keep me lying on my left side during labour , she made me stand only for a very short time because the baby did not slide down, but she was afraid the bladder could be damaged with too much standing -do not know if she was right here, anyway - and I finally gave birth on all fours.

It sounds scaring, I know. I can say it was worth.
Only If I had to do it again I would try an epidureal because it was too painful for me, even though I realize that an epidureal might have worsened thing slowing down the process, but doctors don't think so and this is another long story.

I think my prolapses are now bit worse than before the last baby, but the big damage was with the first one, so,I am really happy with my decision.
I think it is a risk, and you must decide if it worthwile with yr husband, but I do not think there is any "vital" threat either to yr health or yr baby's one.

Best wishes

I'm hoping Jane will give her input here. Ornella, there is the possibility that had you known how to hold and carry your body differently you might have avoided some of the discomfort you experienced during pregnancy as well as a worsening of the prolapse symptoms afterward.

I am sure about that, and, as I have written in some post, the suggestion in yr book for emptying the bladder are SOOO useful even now!
When I came across this site, I was really annoyed by the prolapse, willing to get as much information as possible about pros and cons of surgery, but yr site expressed exactly what I have been feeeling all these years about that not being the "right" solution, only I do not have training and information enough to oppose to the doctors.
On the other side, I wish we do not make the mistake of placing ourselves "against" doctors and REAL scientific progress, so I appreciate any input from any side, as it seems to me you are doing.


Thanks, Kristen. I needed to hear your story, too.
Sue - I feel for you. I've been weighed down with the "should I or shouldn't I have another baby" question every day, too. I only have one child (21 months old) and always thought I wanted two. Either decision will greatly affect his life. I guess what worries me most is - What if I won't be able to be the mother I want to be - i.e. I believe in carrying babies most of the time vs. strollers . . . What if I'm in too much pain to do that? But . . . on the other hand . . . What if I won't have as much trouble as I did with my first because I know so much more now (about what is going on with my body, the type of parent I am, etc.). I also wonder if a lot of my pain was due to my bad tear. What if I don't tear so bad the next time.